Retirement

Another year has come and gone. Fast. Extremely fast. I turned 26 a few days ago and 30 is fast approaching. Last year Zoe was born and life has gone in a totally different direction. Actually it hit that fork a few years ago. I’m no longer a carefree 20 something. I’m a father. A husband. A provider. Caring for a baby is one of the coolest things. The unconditional love is awesome. Last year proved to provide THE happiest day of my life. Marriage(sorry sweetie), graduation, moving out on my own. Nothing compares. Watching the miracle of birth is an amazing thing. I cried the hardest I had cried in a real long time. Twentyfive was a growing up year. I finally considered myself a grown-up. I’m leaving for Colorado in less than 12 hours to go backpacking for a week. Though I haven’t told anyone until now, this will be my last hiking ‘trip’. There may be the occasional weekend getaway, but its time to move on. We are going to Arizona at the end of August for a week long vacation with Zoe. As the years go on I want to give Zoe the most memories that I can. I want to be able to take her to Disneyworld, Mount Rushmore, and to other cool places that I never got to do and share them with her. I just don’t want to take that extra week away from her. When she gets older and starts looking at all the old photos of me in my prime and wants to know what I did, then perhaps I’ll dig out all of my gear and show her the ropes.
So until a great opportunity shows itself or Zoe peaks interest, I’m done. This next week is kind of like a farewell tour. Or it could just end up being a like a Cher farewell tour….

Until then, I leave you with the words to a song that means a lot to me…more times than not, it seems I succumbed to what I never wanted to happen.

“I Don’t Mind” – by Peter Bingen

Well I am looking, I am searching, I have found
Near the ground, my soul, myself, beneath this trail.
There’s no other place I’d rather be.
Can’t you see me out here walkin’ in the rain and hail.

Purpose of life seems to me is
Not to take yourself too seriously.
I wouldn’t want to be an old man sittin’ in an office
Building someplace far away, with worry on my face.

Well you can take my car, my stereo, my little money.
Leave me with nothin’ but my trail family.
Take my dress up clothes, my cheap cologne,
My college loans I don’t mind, I don’t mind.

Well if that taxman comes lookin’ I’m at 10,000 feet
Cookin’ up some oatmeal or some rice and beans.

I worship the Spirit who doesn’t just look down
He looks up and through and all around,
Find Him in the rocks and trees. Cause there’s no reason to pray
When you wake up every day to the sunrise over Cito Peak.

So find some ground lace up your boots start walkin’
And you will find reason, enough reason to believe.

Well you can drop your worries at the parking lot
Or way down in the city where the sun burns hot.
Although civilization is a nice place to visit,
I wouldn’t want to live there.

Oh just one final paragraph of advice don’t burn yourselves out. – - -
Be as I am. It’s not enough to fight for the land.
It’s even more important to enjoy it while you can, while it’s still here.

So get out there and hunt and fish and mess around.
Ramble out yonder, explore the woods, encounter the grizz,
Climb the mountains, bag the peaks, run the rivers,
Breathe deep that yet sweet lucid air.

Sit quiet for awhile contemplate the precious stillness
That mystery and awesome space enjoy yourself.
Keep your brain in your head and your head attached to your body.
Body active and alive. And I promise you this much.

I promise you this one sweet victory, over our enemies.
Over those desk bound people with their hearts in a box
And their eyes hypnotized by calculators.
I promise you this one sweet victory…
YOU’LL OUTLIVE THE BASTARDS!